What? Something About Paris??

I must be out of the loop because I have no idea who Paris Hilton is...

The above statement, unfortunately, is false. I wish it was true. Oh, how I wish. To not know anything about Paris Hilton (and who she is sleeping with and who she is wearing and who she is singing about and what kind of alcohol she likes to consume and what her nipples look like and how she used to carry around a small dog until it became unfashionable and now the thing probably sits in a room somewhere wondering why it has suddenly been shunned like the foul beast it is) would be absolutely spectacular. To not be subject to her daily goings-on would be much appreciated. If I knew nothing of her DUI's, court appearance, jail escape, and subsequent re-entry, I would be perfectly content with my life.

Alas, this is not how our country works. For some reason unbeknownst to Yours Truly, we seem to feed on this kind of thing. We leech off the raw emotion this kind of celebrity hounding creates within us, be it a genuine satisfaction that she got her just do, or appalled that such a thing could happen to such a nice rich, racist whore.

This was some sort of headline on every single news source I checked today.

The first link there? As of right now, 8:55pm on Friday, June 8, had a big red banner at the top of their website that read: Breaking News: Paris Hilton ordered back to jail

Breaking news?? How did we come to this? Why are we so utterly devoted to finding out as much as we possibly can about some random person? This woman is not a huge movie star. She is not a star athlete. She is not a famous musician. She is a Rich Person. That is all. Nothing To See Here, Keep Moving.

For crying out loud, a reporter was hit by a car while surrounded by other reporters and photographers trying to get a shot of this bitch being carted back to jail. I don't remember the link so I can't lead you to it, but there was a mob around the police car, the cop used a loudspeaker to tell everyone to get out of the way, and instead of moving they crowded closer. So, the cop took off. Good for him.

I find it sickening how shallow and heartless we, as a people, have become. Our pursuit of everything celebrity dumbs down our culture and whittles down our children's capacity to know what is important and unimportant.

That being said, this is a GREAT picture.


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