Another Great Idea.
I was at a cook-out yesterday at Nichole's cousin's house. Her and her boyfriend (who, as of Friday night, is now her fiance) recently moved into their house and today was the first real Come Check It Out day. There was plenty of beer and food to go around, and the weather cooperated. So it was a good day, nice time.
The night before, Nichole and I went out to the bar and inebriated ourselves, so we were both nursing hangovers that morning. So upon our arrival at the cook-out, I had not yet brought myself back to normal, so started the day out with Iced Tea as opposed to beer. After several cups, it dawned on me that drinking several cups of tea would inevitably make me have to urinate. Sure enough, immediately after said dawning, I had to urinate.
I won't go into detail here, suffice to say I was successful in my endeavor.
Unlike many, many men I've seen in my travels through bathrooms in life, both public and private, I wash my hands after each visit to the lavatory. The only exception to this rule is Port-A-Potties, but we all know those facilities are not ideal conditions to begin with. After using those I simply burn off the first layer of skin on my hands. Pretty much takes care of the bacteria.
So I washed my hands. The soap in there was a very nice, floral scented liquid soap, lavender in color. A relatively typical kind of soap. Smells good, compliments the decor, etc. The kind of soap most women like to buy. Don't get me wrong, us men like that kind of soap, but we are much more prone to buying some generic liquid soap from Rite Aid as opposed to something that could be considered decorative. Although, I do have a Spider-Man soap dispenser.
Anyways, using this soap and thinking about how it's a very girly soap led me to Another Great Idea.
Soap For Men. Actually, I would call it Man Soap. This would be strictly novelty, as what I am going to describe is not something anyone would actually use. Well, some of them might, but I stand by the Novelty statement.
There are a lot of Tough Guys out there. I am confident in saying this, as I am probably the toughest. There are a lot of "manly" men out there. Again, I defer to myself. Us tough guys, sometimes we just don't want to wash our hands in floral scented, pink soap. My Great Idea goes out to the Tough Guys.
For the mechanic? How about some of our new Dirty Carburetor scented soap. It smells like grease and oil, and your buying options include a tin soap dispenser, artificially rusty, or an actual used carburetor (cleaned and sterilized). The soap comes out black. It acts like regular soap, just doesn't smell like it.
Ladies, does your man love the landscaping? Is he the type that looks forward to spring just so he can break out the lawnmower and get to mowin'? How about our Fresh Mow Man Soap. He'll love getting that hard work off his hands while coming out smelling like freshly mowed grass. For this, we provide a clear bottle so the green soap shows through, with an optional second layer attachment. In between the second layer and the actual soap bottle, there is room enough for a thin layer of his own grass to be added in for a touch of personalization.
Is your Dad a badass on the grill? Is he the go-to-guy for any and all family cook-outs? The keeper of the flame? If so, he might enjoy himself Man Soap's BBQ Blitz. It's a husky scent of barbeque sauce and cooked meat that is sure to please. With it's dark crimson hue, it's a definite keeper with the Barbeque Sauce Bottle dispenser. Or, to avoid confusion for anyone else using your restroom, maybe you should go with our triple-stacked burger dispenser. Looks like a giant meat masterpiece, cleans like a giant meat masterpiece wouldn't clean.
I'll end with what is sure to be our best seller, here at Man Soap, Inc. I call it Game Day. It's an amalgam of scents, ranging from dirt, to hot dogs, to hot pretzels, a touch of beer, and leather. Just the thing to get yourself ready for the big game. This can be ordered in any ball shape; football, baseball, basketball, soccer ball, etc. No hockey pucks, sorry. The soap comes out in a smooth dirty dirt brown, the same color you would have to wash out of your sweats after a rough and tumble game of tackle football in the backyard.
So that's my Great Idea. You can add it to the other great ideas I've had and will have in the future. All I need now is some start-up cash.
At some point I'll include some of my other ideas I don't think I've written about, including a Great Idea for a bar/arcade/club, and a Great Idea for an air-freshener that smell like a book store. It doesn't sound awesome, but after I explain it, you'll be like, "Wow. That is awesome."
Oh, also, I'm going to New Mexico for about a week in two days. I'm sure I'll have something to bore you with when I get back.
Until then, be excellent to each other.
The night before, Nichole and I went out to the bar and inebriated ourselves, so we were both nursing hangovers that morning. So upon our arrival at the cook-out, I had not yet brought myself back to normal, so started the day out with Iced Tea as opposed to beer. After several cups, it dawned on me that drinking several cups of tea would inevitably make me have to urinate. Sure enough, immediately after said dawning, I had to urinate.
I won't go into detail here, suffice to say I was successful in my endeavor.
Unlike many, many men I've seen in my travels through bathrooms in life, both public and private, I wash my hands after each visit to the lavatory. The only exception to this rule is Port-A-Potties, but we all know those facilities are not ideal conditions to begin with. After using those I simply burn off the first layer of skin on my hands. Pretty much takes care of the bacteria.
So I washed my hands. The soap in there was a very nice, floral scented liquid soap, lavender in color. A relatively typical kind of soap. Smells good, compliments the decor, etc. The kind of soap most women like to buy. Don't get me wrong, us men like that kind of soap, but we are much more prone to buying some generic liquid soap from Rite Aid as opposed to something that could be considered decorative. Although, I do have a Spider-Man soap dispenser.
Anyways, using this soap and thinking about how it's a very girly soap led me to Another Great Idea.
Soap For Men. Actually, I would call it Man Soap. This would be strictly novelty, as what I am going to describe is not something anyone would actually use. Well, some of them might, but I stand by the Novelty statement.
There are a lot of Tough Guys out there. I am confident in saying this, as I am probably the toughest. There are a lot of "manly" men out there. Again, I defer to myself. Us tough guys, sometimes we just don't want to wash our hands in floral scented, pink soap. My Great Idea goes out to the Tough Guys.
For the mechanic? How about some of our new Dirty Carburetor scented soap. It smells like grease and oil, and your buying options include a tin soap dispenser, artificially rusty, or an actual used carburetor (cleaned and sterilized). The soap comes out black. It acts like regular soap, just doesn't smell like it.
Ladies, does your man love the landscaping? Is he the type that looks forward to spring just so he can break out the lawnmower and get to mowin'? How about our Fresh Mow Man Soap. He'll love getting that hard work off his hands while coming out smelling like freshly mowed grass. For this, we provide a clear bottle so the green soap shows through, with an optional second layer attachment. In between the second layer and the actual soap bottle, there is room enough for a thin layer of his own grass to be added in for a touch of personalization.
Is your Dad a badass on the grill? Is he the go-to-guy for any and all family cook-outs? The keeper of the flame? If so, he might enjoy himself Man Soap's BBQ Blitz. It's a husky scent of barbeque sauce and cooked meat that is sure to please. With it's dark crimson hue, it's a definite keeper with the Barbeque Sauce Bottle dispenser. Or, to avoid confusion for anyone else using your restroom, maybe you should go with our triple-stacked burger dispenser. Looks like a giant meat masterpiece, cleans like a giant meat masterpiece wouldn't clean.
I'll end with what is sure to be our best seller, here at Man Soap, Inc. I call it Game Day. It's an amalgam of scents, ranging from dirt, to hot dogs, to hot pretzels, a touch of beer, and leather. Just the thing to get yourself ready for the big game. This can be ordered in any ball shape; football, baseball, basketball, soccer ball, etc. No hockey pucks, sorry. The soap comes out in a smooth dirty dirt brown, the same color you would have to wash out of your sweats after a rough and tumble game of tackle football in the backyard.
So that's my Great Idea. You can add it to the other great ideas I've had and will have in the future. All I need now is some start-up cash.
At some point I'll include some of my other ideas I don't think I've written about, including a Great Idea for a bar/arcade/club, and a Great Idea for an air-freshener that smell like a book store. It doesn't sound awesome, but after I explain it, you'll be like, "Wow. That is awesome."
Oh, also, I'm going to New Mexico for about a week in two days. I'm sure I'll have something to bore you with when I get back.
Until then, be excellent to each other.
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